


Not One of Them

by luciferstolemymoose



Category: Pocket Monsters | Pokemon (Main Video Game Series), Pocket Monsters: Black & White | Pokemon Black and White Versions
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Blood, Car Accidents, Child Abuse, First Love, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Hospitals, Hurt/Comfort, IsshuShipping - Freeform, Love, M/M, Scars, Stupidity, Tumblr Prompt, Yaoi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-25
Updated: 2015-03-25
Packaged: 2018-03-19 08:41:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,178
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3603672
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/luciferstolemymoose/pseuds/luciferstolemymoose
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Touya and N reveal a little bit about their individual pasts, and realize that they are more alike than they initially thought. A barren hospital waiting room doesn't seem like the proper place for story time, but for some people, it does more than enough to serve its purpose as a shelter from the storms of some unfortunate lives. A short story that barely scrapes the surface of the painful truth of abuse, and tells of a case where angels can exist without their wings.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not One of Them

**Author's Note:**

> This prompt was initially supposed to turn into a comedy, but something went wrong along the way. I might try again at some point to make it more amusing in a comical sense. Enjoy the random scoop of angst from my brain. It isn't too well thought out, and the sentences are kind of repetitive and mushy, but I hope you enjoy nonetheless. :)

The morning was a quiet one. In fact, it was going by much too slowly for Touya’s liking. He felt it made him sluggish, and he decided that he was likely to stay in that state of mind for a while. In a word, Touya felt trapped. He trapped himself in a loop; days, then weeks, and months, all the same--wake up, live life, go to sleep.

Ever since the day his sister died of pneumonia, Touya had felt trapped. She was a sweet girl, and she was Touya’s only childhood friend. It was her own fault that she died. Suicide wasn’t the reason, however; she had been a drug addict for the better part of four years. It was only a matter of time until it caught up to her. She overdosed, which weakened her immune system. A few weeks later, she caught pneumonia and never recovered. Touya had kept himself healthy by saying that she did it to herself.

The drive to Touya’s campus was about forty-five minutes. He chose to commute, not put up with three other roommates on campus. The sky was cast with mouse-grey clouds, tiny droplets of water pebbled Touya’s windshield, though it wasn’t heavy enough for windshield wipers.  
The rain picked up quicker than anticipated. Touya’s hand fumbled for the knob that would activate the wipers. His eyes never left the road. Through the foggy, muddling windshield, Touya watched as a spotlight turned from yellow to red. He slid, his vehicle taking longer to slow down due to the slick road. Luckily, he came to a delayed stop.  


Touya never realized how dangerous hydroplaning could become.  


The trucker behind him slammed on the brakes, his trailer swinging sharply to the right, dragging four cars off the highway with it. Touya’s car was not one of them. He shot forward when the hull of the truck launched into his bumper. As if that wasn’t enough, two other drivers swerved to miss him once he slipped into the intersection. The third one made contact on the passenger side rear, and the fourth busted him directly on the driver’s side front. Touya cracked his head off the driver’s door at the time of contact. He could hear his nose and jaw shatter, but he felt nothing. His skin went numb and his head became cloudy. Finally, he was only aware of his unsteady breathing. His thoughts were blacker than nothing, and he was not aware of any physical body that he could attach his mind to.  


Slowly, Touya became aware of the sounds of a typical accident scene; sirens, screeching breaks, slamming doors. He had yet to see anything, as he was incapable of forcing opening his eyes. The feeling caused him to panic when the thought of permanent paralysis passed through his mind. That thought itself willed him to open his eyes. It had become night time…or had the clouds just gotten darker? Touya’s head pounded like ocean waves against a rock face. He envisioned his veins physically surfacing with each hum of his pulse. The image alone tired him out.  


At an agonizing pace, Touya’s fingers began twitching, and then his hand, and finally his arm. He brought it up to his head, pressing his palm against his head, and brushing his fingers through his wet hair. The rain and the sweat had left him wetter than a waterfall. Removing his hand, he brought it to his face and drearily gazed at the sticky, red mixture on his fingers. He barely took notice of it, as he was too tired to care. He closed his eyes once more. The sound of footsteps entered his listening range. They splashed in the deep puddles, and seemed to stop right next to Touya.

The muffled shouts of EMTs and police officers blocked any other senses that Touya had previously been in control of. Touya drifted off, the sounds of ambulances lulling him to sleep.

-  


Four people had died in the accident. Touya was not one of them.  


The EMTs and doctors called him blessed. They say he survived because the impact of the second car propelled him out of his vehicle and onto the grass by the side of the road. So he hadn’t banged his head off of the door, he had smacked it against the ground.  


Twenty-three stitches to the head and an ugly strip of plaster against his nose later, the doctors said that Touya was good to go. He was to come back only if there were complications.  


On the walk home (as he obviously had no car or money with him), Touya noticed that he limped if he stepped too hard on his left side. The doctors had told him to come back, had there been any issues, though Touya dismissed it as a temporary side effect of the accident.  


Three weeks later, that thought occurred less to him. Every morning when he woke up, he found it hard to stand. His knee trembled under his weight, and his shins felt like splintered wood. Each step he took shot a violent strike of pain through his foot and up to his hip. One morning, he collapsed against his bed. He pulled himself to his closet and grabbed the crutch he had used when he once broke his right foot. Throwing on a rain jacket, Touya trudged, in his red rubber boots, to the hospital.

-  


About twenty people could be taken care of at a time when in the walk-up wing of the hospital (where there were no required appointments). Touya was not one of them.  


He and around six others littered the poorly decorated waiting room. One corner held a fake plant in a cheap plastic pot. In another sat a fish tank; the filter being the only sound filling the silence. Somebody switched off the television that hung on the wall on account of an older patient in the waiting room who looked like she had a disgusting irritation in her ear. A sad magazine table sat in the middle of the room, dusty and untouched.  


Touya sighed, slouched in his gross hospital chair, and kicked out his good leg. He caught the end of one of his crutch that had been propped against his chair, and knocked them to the ground. Touya weakly reached for it; he could really care less about picking it up.  


“Easy there, kiddo,” A tired voice sounded to his immediate right. The hand belonging to the voice held up the tool that Touya had bumped to the floor.  


“Thanks man,” Touya smiled weakly.  
“No problem!” The stranger smiled, appearing a bit too giddy for a hospital waiting room.

A few more minutes of awkward silence passed amongst the occupants of the waiting room. As people entered and exited, Touya began to feel impatient. He began tapping his feet on the tile floor.  


The kind stranger turned to him again.  
“Your foot is hurt, I wouldn’t advise tapping it against the ground like that.”  
Touya became confused.  


“How do you know my foot is bothering me?” Even if it had been his entire leg that ached, a foot was still a close enough guess to worry him.  


“Well, you are carrying a crutch. If you had broken your elbow, I would have to question your mindset.” The strange man spoke confusedly.  


Oh. Right. Crutch. Touya felt embarrassed.  


“It’s alright, kid. What happened to you? Must’ve been pretty bad.” He was smiling again, this time out of pity. Touya thought for a moment, and he decided he had nothing to lose.  


“Was in a pretty nasty car accident. Doctors said I was super lucky because I walked away with barely a scratch. A week from today, I’m supposed to get my stitches taken out, but my leg started hurting something awful a few weeks ago. It’s been bothering me since my day of release, now that I think about it,” He stared down at his hands cupped in his lap the entire time he spoke. Glancing up, he realized that the stranger had been listening the entire time, looking right at him.  


“N,” He laughed.  
“…O?” Touya guessed.  
“No, no,” The man smiled wider, his eyes and nose scrunching up in a child-like way. “My name. My name is N. It’s weird, I know, but,” Touya cut him off. He wasn’t sure why, though.  


“It’s alright, that’s my bad. My name is Touya, so I’ve got a pretty strange name too. Imagine that,” He grinned for the first time in a while.  
“So you can smile,” N leaned forward, resting his cheek on his fist, and his elbows on his knees. “That sounds pretty harsh. I’m glad to hear you got out alright.”  


“Thank you. You’re, well, kind of the first person who’s actually told me that.” Touya vocalized his realization.  
“Honestly?” The surprised response came. “That’s unbelievable. Nobody was glad to hear you were alright?” Touya shook his head, his smile fading. “People these days…” N spoke with sagacity.  


“Well, Touya, I for one know that the world would’ve been deprived of a pretty strong kid if you hadn’t gotten out alright. I can feel it.” His eyes softened.  


So that’s what concern feels like… Touya had never known the feeling.  


“What’s wrong? Did I say something weird? My father tells me that I happen to do that quite often.” N retracted his arm from the arm rest and backed away.  
“No!” Touya blinked. “It’s just that nobody has ever showed concern for me before…”  
“You too?” Touya became shocked at the response.  
“What do you mean, N?” He turned his head.  


“You really don’t want to know.” N turned away, dejectedly.  
“If I didn’t want to know, then I wouldn’t have asked you.” Touya reassured him.  


N turned back towards him and gave him a half-hearted smile. He held up one of his arms. Red brush burns and scars wrapped all around his veins, and there were permanent indents around his entire wrist. The other arm was still by his side.  


“N…why are you here at the hospital?”  


“Don’t laugh at me.” He lashed defensively, then muttered an apology. He lifted his hand.  


It was handcuffed to a decent-sized tree branch.

-  


“Crazy night out?” Touya tried.  


“No!” N yanked his hand down, shaking it around in an attempt to loosen the handcuffs.  


“Sorry man, but that’s some BDSM shit right there. Maybe not quite 50 Shades worthy, but with some practice…” Touya drifted into silence. N’s gaze rested on the far wall. His breathing became shaky, and his fists clenched. Touya scooched closer to him, putting a hand on his shoulder.  
“I’m kind of a jerk, if you haven’t noticed. Honestly, I’m not trying to act mean. No one has ever taught me otherwise. My family was kind of…unhealthy.” N took note of the ‘was’ in Touya’s statement.  


“I don’t think you’re a jerk,” N deadpanned. “Even if you are laughing. This is the nicest anybody has ever been to me.” Touya found that statement preposterous. “Besides,” N bit his lip, “Getting handcuffed to a huge, unwieldy tree branch is pretty funny,” Both boys started to smile, and then chuckle. Touya snorted, and N began laughing until he just about cried. The two remaining occupants of the waiting room gave them strange looks. Touya leaned against the taller man’s shoulder, unable to stay upright from his fit of laughter. He hid his face in shame.  


“You’re hiding,” N bumped him off of his shoulder.  
“Yeah, I snorted! That was remarkably embarrassing!” He punched him lightly in the arm. N just shrugged, his arm twisting uncomfortably in the handcuffs once more. Touya became serious again.  


“N,” He gripped the other’s wrist gently. “You don’t have to come to the hospital to get handcuffs off. Why are you here?” N sighed. He opened his mouth.  


“1023?” The woman at reception cried out.  
Touya looked toward the number assigned to him. 1023. He stared nervously at his new friend.  


“I’ll wait outside for you.” He smiled. “We can grab some coffee and I’ll walk you home. Alright?” N gripped the tinier boy on the shoulders. He reached for his crutch and helped him stand. “Hope you’re alright.”  


“I’ll be fine, stranger. Don’t forget about that coffee.” Touya teased.  
“Wouldn’t dream of it.” N pulled Touya’s beanie over his eyes and pushed him lightly towards the door.

-  


Nine different people entered the ER that night (under Touya’s doctor's orders). Neither Touya nor N were one of them. Touya was released within forty minutes, armed with lots of prescription drugs and a sturdier crutch. Touya had been right—the pain was temporary, he was just weak. Once he walked back through the door to the waiting room, Touya silently thanked himself for being a pussy. N was asleep in a poorly upholstered chair—tree branch-free, on top of that.  


Touya grabbed a dusty magazine from the table and thumped him on the leg with it. N jolted awake and whined. Scarily.  


“Whoa, didn’t mean to scare you there.” Touya put his hands up in surrender.  


“S’okay.” N sighed. “Coffee?” He grinned tiredly.  
“You promised.” Touya teased.  


-  


The air outside had become slightly cooler, though it was typical night-time weather for the middle of April.  


“N,” Touya’s voice tightened. “It’s still bothering me, but I totally understand if you don’t want to talk about it. Why-“  
“Why was I at the hospital?” Touya nodded. “I’ll tell you if you promise to tell me why nobody has ever showed you compassion.”  


“Why do you care about that?” Touya inquired.  
“Why do you care about why I was at the hospital?” N stared straight at him.  


Touya was left speechless. He shrugged, his cheeks pink. “Dunno,” He exhaled. “I don’t mean to be intrusive… It just felt right to ask. You seem bothered by it.”  


“You seem bothered by the lack of compassion in your life.”  


“Well wouldn’t anybody be bothered by that?!” Touya lashed, “How do you think it feels to never have somebody tuck you in at night, to never have somebody read you a bed time story, to never have somebody say ‘I love you,’ because they’re too busy _cussing each other out, throwing beer bottles at their children’s heads, smoking weed and shooting heroin to give two shits about their own children?! Any time I fell down, I got myself back up again. **Do you know what happens next?”**_  


“They push you right back down. I know. It’s a horrific, empty, _endless_ feeling,” Touya never intended for N to butt in. “And it never goes away.” N was shivering, from cold or fear, Touya wasn’t sure.  


“I’m so sorry.” Touya grabbed N’s arm with his free hand. “I didn’t know,” He stared at the ground in shame.  
“It’s okay because you actually know what I’m talking about.” N pulled him up to look into his eyes. “You aren’t just pretending to care like everybody else.”  


“I would never pretend. It just hurts more.”  
“I know.”  


N pulled Touya’s beanie over his eyes again.  
“So, that’s what’s wrong with you.” N didn’t mean for that sentence to come out as harshly as it did, and Touya knew that. It was obvious that the boy lived (if one would call it living) sheltered his whole life, whereas Touya had been overexposed to the world. They were both, in a word, broken; quite horribly. Touya nodded dismally. N caught him by surprise when he tugged him into an awkward side hug. Touya slowly focused on his friend’s eyes. N pointed down towards his own stomach. He pulled his shirt up at an angle, revealing his narrow hip bone and stomach.  


As if it weren’t bothering Touya enough that the boy was about as thin and pasty as a sheet of paper, his skin was utterly peppered with red cuts and white scars; long, short, and in between. One of the gashes showed every sign of being fresh. The blood was still smeared a tad bit around the edges, and the scab that was forming over it cracked open in some spots, releasing some clear fluid and more blood. The wound showed every sign of healing, which was good.  


“I wanted to make sure it wouldn’t get infected.” N whispered, lowering his shirt cautiously. He hissed when the fabric broke off some of the scab tissue, opening part of his cut.  


“Did it?” Touya hovered a hand over where his gash was located, having no intention of touching it.  
“Luckily, no, it didn’t.” He beamed cheerfully.  


“Why,” Touya moved his hand down and pushed it against N’s hip, far enough away from his wound as to not irritate it.  


“Well, something gets infected when microorganisms enter the-“  
“No, N,” He clicked his tongue, chuckling to himself, “Why are there so many cuts on your body? What happened to your wrists? Are you hurt anywhere else?”  


“In this case, my father cuffed me to a dead tree and whipped me until my skin split open. He told me that he didn't have a precise reason to hurt me, but he let me come to the hospital so I wouldn’t die. However he wouldn’t un-cuff me, so I had to break the dead branches. It took me 7 hours to gather the strength. I’ve got scars everywhere. Even on my eyes. I’m partially blind in my right eye, so I should be wearing glasses, but it’s alright.” N plastered on the most fake smile that one could muster up. It was the most miserable scene that Touya had ever experienced.  


“It’s not.” Touya downright frowned. “Forget the coffee. I’m not letting you go back there.”  


N looked down at him from their unceasing side-hug position. “…Touya, what,” He swallowed, “What do you mean?”  


“You’re coming with me. Home.” Touya dislodged himself from N’s hold and took a step back.  
“I don’t have a home, Touya. I have a prison, but I can’t say that. He’ll hurt me.” N sniveled.  
“I won’t let him.” Touya clenched his fist.  


“It’s too late, Touya. He’s here. He’ll hurt you unless I take it. I won’t let him hurt you, Touya. I barely know you, but you’ve been through way too much. I can’t let him hurt someone else because of me.” N started to babble, not really forming coherent words.  
Touya grabbed him by the shoulders. “N,” He shook him gently. “It’s okay. If you come with me, I’ll keep you safe. We’ll call the police and have them sort it out. You won’t be in danger anymore.”  


“No!” N cried. “He’ll find me, he’ll find me, _he’ll find me_ , Touya, he’s going to find me no matter what and he’ll kill me, Touya! He’ll KILL ME.” It was obvious that this issue would not sort itself out overnight.  


“N, look at me,” Touya cupped his cheeks, forcing the other boy to focus solely on him. “Just come with me, I’ll keep you safe for now. You can come home, get cleaned up and eat something. I’ll take care of you. I don’t care who you are, and I don’t care who your family is. All I know is that you’re more than good enough to not deserve this. Nobody deserves this, especially not somebody as innocent and as kindhearted as you. I’m going to rescue you, N.”  


“You…need…to…stay…safe…before…me…” N sobbed between each word, struggling to catch his breath.  
“We’ll stay safe together, stupid,” Touya brushed a hand through his hair affectionately. “That’s the idea. I swear, I won’t let him hurt me or you. We both need this, N,” said boy appeared baffled by the gentle hand running its fingers through his hair carefully, and not pulling it. “See, you can’t even tell that I’m being nice to you. All you know is that this petting feels good, right?” N nodded.  


“That feels very nice, Touya. Thank you,” N grinned sincerely.  


“I promise you, N. I’ll do everything in my power to keep both you and me safe from harm. Even though I’ve just met you, I feel like you deserve the world, and I want to help you learn whatever it takes for you to feel safe. Like I said, nobody deserves a world of pain.”  
“Especially not somebody so innocent.” N finished the thought.  


“I’m not entirely sure I got my point across in the exact way I intended…” Touya rubbed the back of his head.  
“You use big words when you’re nervous,” N beamed. “But I understand. For now, at least. It’s hard to convey how grateful I am, but I’m also terrified.”  


“Well don’t be,” Touya reassured him. “It’s two against one. You don’t have to live in fear of him anymore. You’ll be safe with me, and once we get settled, we’ll figure out what to do. I don’t know what you are to me, N, but all I know is that I want to protect you. For whatever reason, I want to keep you safe, and I will. How does that sound?”  


“It sounds too perfect.”  
“Well, in a sense, it is.” Touya spoke.  
“What do you mean?” N questioned.  
“If you hadn’t gotten out of that tree fast enough, then we would have missed each other at the hospital. Also, you had enough strength to talk to me on more than one occasion. If you hadn’t then we wouldn’t be here.” Touya’s tone was a happy one.  


“Thank you for being here, Touya,” N’s eyes glazed over in relief. “You’re the first stranger to not be one of them. One of the people who pretends to understand. Someone who just feigns sorrow for me, and then continues with their life. You’re the first person who has ever wanted to do something for me.”  
“Well, of course,” Touya tightened his grip on his friend’s arm. “I want to help you because I actually understand you. It doesn’t matter how long you’ve known somebody, it matters how hard you try to get to know that somebody.”  


“I would be inclined to try to get to know you, Touya.”  
“I’m glad to hear that from you, N.”  


“Touya,” N began after a brief period of silence.  
“Yes?” A blunt reply.  
“I think I love you.” N pondered aloud. "I don't necessarily know what _kind_ of love it is, but..."  


“N,” Touya snickered. “You could barely tell that when I was petting your head, I was showing you affection. I’m not saying you don’t know what love is,” He paused to rephrase his statement. “What is love to you, N?’  


“Well, platonic, romantic, or otherwise…that doesn’t really matter. To me, love is like a dog who’s happy to see you, even after you’ve been away all day. Love is waking up sick on a winter morning to hot soup and a kiss on the cheek. Love is having the roughest day of your life, and knowing no matter what, that night you’ll be laying down in a nice warm bed with the person who makes it the best day of your life. Love is blanket forts, scary stories, fireplaces, hot chocolate, movie nights, winter storms, and rainy days. Love isn’t something that’s forced, it just comes naturally. It flows, and no matter what kind of love it is, it is a mutual emotion. Love changes you for the better, and love protects you. Is that what love is, Touya?”  


“Love is what you make of it,” Touya squeezed his friend close; gently, with both arms. “Yes, N, that sounds like love to me.”  


“I want to learn more about love.” N stated seriously.  
“We’ll learn together, okay?” Touya smiled sweetly. “Ready for step one?” N nodded eagerly.  


“Okay,” Touya backed away from the hug, but he kept his hold on N’s arms. “Step one is getting something to eat, beanpole, you’re as skinny as a twig.”  
“That cannot be fixed overnight, Touya,” N followed Touya’s example and ruffled the hair that stuck out from his beanie.  
“Darn,” Touya joked. N giggled at his childishness.  


Touya grabbed the taller boy’s wrist carefully, guiding him down the sidewalk. They stopped and got some things to make back at Touya’s apartment. That evening, the two friends fell asleep on Touya’s couch while watching Captain America and drinking warm tea. Touya hung his arms loosely around the other’s torso, sheltering him from a now (and hopefully permanently) nonexistent threat. N woke up late the next morning, the smell of freshly brewing coffee, and the sound of bare feet against the floor entering his senses. Touya sat down on the edge of the couch, handing him a mug of coffee and kissing his temple.  


“Good morning.”  


Both Touya and N were betrayed by many revered people in their lives; mothers, fathers, and siblings alike. Even if Touya was the farthest away from somebody who should care for another person, N was more than grateful to Touya for not hurting him; for not being one of them.

**Author's Note:**

> I feel like I didn't quite get my point across, but hey, sometimes emotions can't be expressed inside of limited sentences.   
> This is also (most likely) a grammatical nightmare. I always end up finding mistakes after publishing, no matter how many times I proofread. Comment if you enjoyed my fic, you have no idea how much it means to me! :) Thank you!


End file.
